I am sick and fucking tired of magazine racks.
I swear. We should take them (and the magazines they house)
and sacrifice them to the Gods by tossing them in some firey pit (akin to the
lava pool featured in Lord of The Rings)
laughing while we watch them burn. Except for Psychology Today, or that one real estate magazine that I like that
I can’t remember the name of. Those can stay. All the rest, to the Gods.
I swear, there is a reason for my ramblings.
I know I’ve bitched about the media numerous times (yep, I said numerous) in
the past, but today really peeved me the fuck off, so I decided to blog about
it.
So, I’m waiting in line at Wal-Mart. My arms are laden down
with pet food for the Cockateil I have (his name is Tick). He eats a lot, and as it so appears, I
am the only one who feeds him. I guess when it comes down to it I should be the
one to replenish the food because I’m really the only one who pays any
attention to the little bastard anymore (we have a love/hate relationship).
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| Tick, editing my Political Sociology paper |
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| That's us. A "love" moment |
Anyway. I’m being corralled through a maze of plastic
barriers. A voice yells over an intercom for customers to “please proceed to
register X”, and people are herded like cattle through the maze to make their
purchases and leave. Now, what you must understand is that this maze is lined
with every impulse buy item known to man kind. Candy bars, gum, drinks, batteries,
razors, sunglasses, the first born of your enemy... you name it. There were also magazines. Now, I don’t
usually waste my time reading the headlines of magazines unless they’re super
interesting, draw my attention because of the cover photo, or are featuring Oprah. That day, I had
time on my hands. I was waiting to be herded through the checkout process so I
could leave. My eyes couldn’t help but to aimlessly glance around, not really
taking anything in until…
the magazine rack.
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| The offending party |
The 10 Best Slim Down
Secrets!, Drop 10 lbs Fast!, Fight Fat after 40!, Weigh Less by the End of This
Week!, Slim Down Secrets – The #1 Way to Lose Lbs, Flat Abs! were just some
of the headlines that were staring back at me. Among these magazines were a few
Healthy living mags, A few home owners/DIY magazines, and Archie Comics (awesome). Fact
of the matter is is that the vast majority of the reading material on this rack
(if you would call it that) screamed at you, in one way or another, that you need
to perfect or improve yourself in some way. That way just so happens to be by
losing weight. Clearly we are all fatties (unhealthy fatties) who are in
desperate need for a “bikini body” in order to feel happy, healthy, and lead a
fantabulous life. I would be a liar if I said that I wasn’t slightly triggered
by these headlines.
So, there I stand, arms full of birdseed and various other
treats and toys for dear Tick, contemplating my new size and shape, feeling as
if there was something wrong with it. I must be getting “fat” enough; I must
have gained enough weight. I mean, I wouldn’t want to get too carried away with
this weight restoration thing, would I!? The women on those magazines are perfect! Did
they follow these miracle diet plans? Are their perfect lives the result of these crash diets,
restrictive lifestyles and extreme exercise regimens? They look so happy!
It was at that moment that I told ED to shut the fuck up. I
needed to step back, take my own advice, and be a good media critic.
Advertising is made to make you feel inferior in some way, that you need to
improve yourself in some way. Lucky for you these magazines have the solution!
Now. We should all know that this is bullshit. Bodies are
bodies. Bodies are shaped differently. People love bodies for various reasons,
and there is no sense in fucking changing who we are if we are happy with ourselves in
the first place just because some ideal or magazine dictates that we should not
be. This is something easier said than done, and probably sounds really silly
coming from me, but that is my rant. And this is why magazine racks should be
sacrificed. Having no place to display this brainwashing filth would make me a much
happier person.
*Phew* Now that that’s over with, I can get on to some other
things. I have been tossing some blogging ideas arounsd for the past little
while (as I’ve had some severe writer’s block lately). Thanks to some input
from some lovely friends and family, I’ve narrowed it down to a post about
“ways to relax” and a post surrounding body image issues in males. The "ways to
relax post" will likely take the same form as my most recent post, “The ShittyDays”. The difference here is that I will be listing ways to let off some
stem, wind down, take it easy, and cope rather than give insight into what I do
in order to keep on fighting and get through my day. I will also be able to let
you in on my struggle with this whole “relaxing” thing. Trust me, it’s harder
than you’d think to relax and have you time when you’ve been deprived of it for
so long.
In Recent News
I’ve been busy trying to keep my head above water. I force
myself to do a lot of things (e.g.:get out of bed, shower, leave the house,
socialize, or at least attempt to, eat). So far, so good. I mean, it’s tough.
It’s a fight. Day in and day out this is a fight. I am exhausted in every
possible way, but I’m still gunning. I’ve gotten back into painting as of late.
I’ll let you in on how my first few attempts went in my future post. Needless
to say have reached a point where I can be
satisfied with my end results. I have also found a love for gardening. I find
it so oddly freeing. I just finished planting and spreading mulch in my front
flower bed today, so I’m excited to watch my plants grow. The box planters are
next, as well as caring for my parsley plant, mint plant and banana plant
(named Tristan). I still attend a lot of movies (most recently The Hangover Part 3, which was seriously
dumbfunny. I needed the laugh, though and the company was fantastic). I also
managed to shave six minutes off of
my outdoor running time! On May 31st I ran an outdoor 5 km in
30:45!! Needless to say I am quite a proud lady, My goal to be healthy enough
to run a 5 km road race in August is looking to be a reality! Fuck yes. That’s
right.
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| Ignore the gross sweatiness. Me just after my run! |
I’m not going to get into the tough side of things right now.
In a nut shell I’m just not sure anymore. Like I said, every day is a fight. I
feel as if I’m losing steam, but I know deep down that this warrior doesn’t
give up the fight. I'll probably have more to say after my session this week.
Maybe then the words will come easier.
So, if you have any input as to where A Love Affair should be headed in the future (including topics you would like to see covered) feel free
to comment, let me know via twitter, or email/facebook me! I’m always up for suggestions
(as you are well aware). Thank you so much for reading. You are all part of the reason I keep fighting. I know that you’re gunning for
me, so I guess I should too. I suppose I’m not just doing this for me but for you as well. It gives me purpose. So thank you.
Everyone needs some sort of focus, am I right?
Everyone needs some sort of focus, am I right?
Until next time
Heath
Heath
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